Bonding over their love of music, they formed a fast friendship. Thinking that part of her faith meant that she should avoid dating, she put her lack of romantic interest in boys down to a commitment to God.Īt 22, she met a woman who was also in her early 20s, through mutual friends. Niya preferred friendships with boys but these never developed into crushes.Īt 14, she became a Christian. Niya’s father was away a lot, leaving her mother in charge of the family. Niya had to dress conservatively and was expected to act in a demure way. She and her siblings had to be home earlier than their friends.
![gay memes girls gay memes girls](https://pics.me.me/wine-mom-yourlru-every-time-i-meet-a-hot-girl-6942831.png)
She was brought up by strict parents in a suburban neighbourhood of Bujumbura. Niya has just turned 27, and this is the most comfortable she has felt. Nella took her children and moved in with relatives. He vowed to keep her sexuality a secret from the wider community for the sake of their children. In 2016, her husband found out about these conversations and her marriage broke down. Women who soon became her closest friends. Those in the know would respond.īuoyed by what she found, Nella began connecting with women online. Nella would send these images and emoticons to other women. It largely relies on internet shorthand, obscure symbols used by lesbians around the world. What she discovered was that there is a shorthand, a secret code, that local lesbian women use to reach out to each other. She then narrowed her search to Bujumbura. Suddenly, she realised she was not alone. She turned to social media and carried out searches for women who like women. She says it would compromise her children’s safety. She doesn't want to go into much detail about her marriage. The couple barely communicated and she dreaded intimacy.Īfter the birth of her youngest child, Nella says she began to feel like the most isolated woman in the world. Nella’s husband didn’t know about her sexual identity. And as one of the 2% of Muslims in a majority Christian nation, she felt even more marginalised. “Can you even force someone who has no rights to begin with?” she asks.Īs a woman from a country like hers, Nella says her rights were already diminished.
![gay memes girls gay memes girls](https://cdn.guff.com/site_0/media/33000/32238/items/c9cccfdab9c648a01afaea05.jpg)
She says she was forced into marriage, but wonders if “forced” is the right word. At 20 she was getting on a bit.Ī wedding was hastily arranged and Nella resigned herself to becoming a wife. There was little time to lose, they insisted. They knew of a rich man who was interested in her. There was no money for an education, they said, and besides they didn't believe a woman needed one. When her parents died, Nella's brothers increased the pressure. They would introduce her to members of the extended family, in the hope they could find a match. But her family were constantly urging her to get married. When she was a teenager, Nella dreamed of going to university. But she's sure she won't be recognised, because when she goes to meet her girlfriend, she removes the hijab she wears at home. Someone who knows her family may see her. Her family don’t know, of course, and she's taking a risk meeting up. The pair met on a social networking site and the relationship is still new. It’s the first time she’s been able to introduce her that way to someone, she says. “My girlfriend,” she writes, by way of a virtual introduction. She’s sitting at a table in an open-air restaurant, her arm around a young woman whose hair is styled in thin cornrows. Her curled black hair is visible and falling on her shoulders. It’s the same T-shirt she was wearing in the park with the women. They are playing up for the camera, contorting their faces into comical expressions.Īnother photo appears and this time she is wearing loose jeans and a fitted T-shirt. She's pictured sitting on a chair with young children around her. Nella sends a photo to the BBC using an encrypted app. But there is also the danger that people within their own communities may turn on them. “We’d be in so much trouble if people know who we are,” Nella says.
![gay memes girls gay memes girls](https://pics.onsizzle.com/two-girls-kissing-in-front-of-an-anti-gay-protest-15009480.png)
The women, who are all in their 20s and early 30s, haven’t known each other long.
![gay memes girls gay memes girls](https://i.pinimg.com/736x/fd/f5/7c/fdf57c23523441757ba783914288cf31.jpg)
This could be a group of friends in any park, in any country.īut this is Burundi, where being who they are is against the law. It’s an in-joke – a sign of their identity and independence. The T-shirts are important because printed on each one is a discreet, matching symbol. Most of them are wearing jeans and T-shirts in various colours, patterns and styles. Sometimes in public but mostly behind closed doors. They meet once a month, in different places. The women are in high spirits, chatting animatedly, playfully sketching patterns on each other using body paint, and sharing a picnic. It’s a great day to meet friends in the park. It’s mild enough to kick a ball around, not oppressive enough to feel faint in the heat.